CNN Interview with Boo

Piers: Hello, Boo. Is that your real name or is there some other name you wish to be called?

Boo: I am actually Princess Bodacious Persia, but my person insists on calling me Boo. Sometimes she calls me Boo-Boo and that just makes me want to scratch furniture until she screams. I prefer to be called Your Highness.

Piers: Well, then, Your Highness, what is the best thing about living with your person?

Boo: She feeds me regularly and seems to be pretty trainable. I have had to make some extra accommodation because the poor girl seems to be a few mice short of a full meal but I know she means well.

Piers: Rumor has it that you have a tendency to be a little pushy. I talked to your person earlier and she said that you actually have been known to herd her towards the kitchen when you are hungry.

Boo: Excuse me. I do not consider that being pushy. As I said earlier, she is getting forgetful and I need to have ways to remind her that I need to be fed. I do not hunt for my food. I expect to be fed at regular times.

Piers: Well, your person also complained that you don’t do anything around the house. In fact, she stated that she suspects that you spend most of your day sleeping. Is this true?

Boo: Excuse me, but I thought we had agreed that I would not be talking about what I do when my person is not at home. That is private information.

Piers: I don’t think we had any sort of agreement. I can’t imagine why you wouldn’t want to discuss this.

Boo: Sir, I believe you are being rude.

Piers: I just asked the question. I thought I asked it in a gentlemanly way. I didn’t realize this was such a volatile subject for you, Boo.

Boo: Ahem. Your highness!

Piers: Excuse me. Your highness. Well, then can you tell us then about the burst of activity that you have every night after your person turns out the light. She says that there is a lot of running and meowing and jumping on the bed. She also said that you have been attacking her feet at night if she moves in her sleep.

Boo: Hahahahhaha!! The woman is crazy! She imagines these things. You should see her in the morning. Her hair looks like something I hacked up on the carpet. I have told you before she is a few sardines short of a tin.

Piers: I was thinking that maybe since you are able to sleep all day that you have more energy in the evening.

Boo: I thought we agreed……. You are being very rude again. I will not talk about this. This was not the agreement. I had other things I could be doing tonight. I was going to sit on the ottoman and stare at my person until she brushed me and there is a bug on the wall in the bedroom that I need to talk to. I don’t need to be here.

Boo walks away with her tail raised as an exclamation point. Her faithful, although thoroughly chastised servant follows along to provide comfort. Boo swears to never allow herself to be interviewed by a British talk show host again unless Javier Bardem is also there. She wants to sit on his lap.