Writing, April, and Purple Hi-Tops

I started the first draft of this post while sitting in my rocking chair on my deck. It is a warm and sunny day and I rested my feet on a footstool my parents had made years ago. Boo came out with me and did not have to be banished for trying to jump between the rails. If I had seen her put her head through she would have been swiftly escorted back indoors, but she decided to go back in on her own instead.

For the past few weeks I have been experiencing a serious case of writer’s block. I couldn't work on the novel and it was a struggle to open the Word file on the computer. I was beginning to think that the only way I could write anything would be if I found a cabin in the woods without internet service. I would then be able to write without the distractions of email and Facebook. I became jealous of writers who spoke of their writing cabins. Isabel Allende writes in a little house on her property from 9 a.m. to 7 p.m. six days a week and begins a new novel every January. I, on the other hand, write for a few hours on occasional weekends. I do not have a writing practice. I have writing hiccups. That needs to change.

A couple of weeks ago, my writing group, the Misplace Modifiers, got together for our monthly meeting. There are five of us and not a one had produced anything in the past month. I did share that I had managed to get a post done to my work blog and had written a five page report for my performance appraisal. They were not impressed as that did not count toward being critiqued by the group.

Denise brought some writing exercises and after praising Sally for having received her contract from a publisher who is going to put her dissertation in print we started to write. I discovered something. I like hand writing. I like to have my thoughts flow from me to pen to paper. I like to scribble a first draft in my own, unreadable to anyone but me, shorthand. I like the flow of it. I decided to cut out the middle man – my computer – and get back to basics. I remembered that I also have preferred writing implements. I like 8 ½ x 11 spiral bound note books with the spiral on top and roller ball ink pens. At Staples yesterday, I found the last two spiral notebooks with the spiral on top and they were only 50 cents. It was kismet. Or karma. Or just plain luck and timing on my part.

So my deck is now my designated writing area. I am not tempted to check my email or stalk ex-boyfriends on Facebook. I don’t have to write at the place where I pay my bills. I now have a writing sanctuary where I can also read and meditate while listening to the birds and watching the chipmunks skitter through the fallen branches and leaves.

Let the writing commence.

April was an exciting month from the very first day when I had the opportunity to speak to a Women’s Studies class at the University of New Hampshire in Durham. It was one of the first warm days of spring and it felt good to be on a college campus. Groups and couples were sitting on the grass and brick walls and music was playing from dorm windows. I felt guilty for keeping students away from the outdoors on such a beautiful day but I thoroughly enjoyed the opportunity to talk to such a young and interested group of women. It was also the day that I discovered that there are at least four ice cream stands on the route between Concord and Durham. I hope that I do not make that drive too often.

April 2 was my 54^th birthday. I have no trouble telling my age since it is really only a number. I managed to celebrate over two days – maybe even throughout the month. On the second, I spent the morning visiting my ex (vs. “old”) housemate, Kat, and her brood of felines. I wanted to visit Lucy (see my last post) and check in with the rest of the cats and the beavers out back in the pond. Afterward, I visited Kristen (another ex-housemate) and her eight month old son, Augustine in Peterborough. We sat outside and watched him play on a blanket. It was so peaceful.

The next day I got my best birthday present. My son and his wife have been making noises for a couple of years about moving away from New Hampshire because of the economy and the weather (neither of which I really feel are better anywhere else). This had been causing me a great amount of angst and had put me into a pretty bad depression a little over a year ago. Now I can rest easy. Chris told me that they will all be moving just a few miles away from where they are now into a house that his father has bought and which Chris and Des will be renting to own. It is a ten year commitment for them which means I can rest easy.

The following week I spent at the Self and Family Conference in Santa Fe, NM. This was the best conference I have ever attended. There were speakers on integrative health care, trauma, and substance abuse. I even had lunch with Stephanie Covington, author of A Women’s Way Through the Twelve Steps, whom I consider the leader in my field of women, substance abuse and trauma. She was helpful in validating what I do and helping me clarify some issues. The icing on the cake for that week was being able to rent a car and drive up to Taos. I didn’t get to see much of Taos on that afternoon, but the taste I had left me wanting more.

Another big event during the month was getting my purple Chuck Taylor Converse hi-tops. Remember that I said that my age was just a number. This was proof. I had gotten it in my head a couple of months ago that I just had to have a pair of purple hi-tops. They are a very necessary part of my wardrobe and I wear them with great pride and comfort.

The rest of the month was a blur. I spent two days in Atlanta, GA where I presented a workshop at the Ending Violence Against Women conference and also did a six hour training with child protective service workers here in NH. I also did a lot of driving trying to spread the knowledge I gained at the Santa Fe conference.

I have been in my job for a full year now and still love it. I have been in New Hampshire for almost five years and have come to love it more each year – even when it snows on Wednesday and is 80 degrees on Saturday. I am very grateful to have the life I have here and - for my new writing space.